SOAPing a patient: Why creativity is not always a virtue in vetting

Sometimes even a vet needs to be creative, for instance when trying to figure out how to keep that Labrador from chewing off his bandage YET AGAIN, or how to splint the broken wing on the chickadee found by that adorable eight-year-old (who is now sitting expectantly--since you told her you were sure you'd think of something--in the waiting room). But creativity is not necessarily an asset in many aspects of veterinary medicine. I'll use SOAPing a patient as an example (note that while your groomer may shampoo, blowdry, brush, comb, clip or strip, clean ears, clip nails, and attend to the dreaded anal glands, SOAPing is only done by your vet!).

First, a little background. Vets, like MDs, use the "SOAP" method to work up a patient: Subjective (patient history as given by patient's owner--or by the patient if he or she can talk); Objective (the factual results of your physical exam plus any other tests and procedures); Assessment (possible diagnoses based on S & O); and finally Plan (what to do about all of the above).

When using this method any creative variations are frowned upon; for instance, you are not supposed to formulate a Plan before you have Objective facts. In addition, you are supposed to follow the same procedure every time you perform a physical exam, so you don't forget anything. Then you are supposed to use this handy mnemonic to make sure that when you reach Assessment, you don't forget any possible categories of rule outs.... Well, how about that! I've forgotten it. Darn. I think I remember some of the categories: Metabolic, Neoplasia, Infectious, Toxin, Autoimmune, Trauma; was it AT MINT? TAN TIM? MAN TIT? Oh well.

But with knitting, there are so many opportunities for creativity, it's enough to make you want to...plead sensory overload and lie on your sofa, staring at the nice, blank ceiling. No. It's incredible, really. Not only are there an infinite variety of stitch patterns, there are also endless options for materials (here's a few you may not have thought of: http://www.vipfibers.com/index.php) and projects. And that's not all. Vogue Knitting lists 14 different casting on methods, 8 different increases, 13 decreases and 13 methods for binding off!

To illustrate the creativity gap between vetting and knitting, I dug out these colorful charmers. Paillettes, right? Wrong. These are RABIES TAGS. If you have a dog, one of these is* dangling from his or her collar right now. Doesn't it seem a shame that they aren't put to other, more decorative uses? I've always thought so, which is why I've saved hundreds of these things (and I am a big believer in Throwing Useless Stuff Away). I'm thinking a Rabidly Sparkly Hat (see Sonya Laska's design on p. 163 in Stitch 'N Bitch); or maybe an Old Yeller scarf. Someday soon I'll post a photo of a swatch with rabillettes attached (after I knit one, in other words.)